ramblings of a realist.

alright, i'm just gonna start out by saying today sucked.

thinking i was going to get to sleep in all day, i stayed up until 3 or so watching psych.

i was awakened at 9:54 a.m. by hannah saying she was at work and forgot her keys, so she needed me to rush to her house, grab the keys, and rush them to provo to waikiki beach tanning so she wouldn't get fired.

i literally crawled out of bed and sprinted out the door... only to find about six inches of snow on my car. i don't own a scraper, so i had to shovel it off with my hands. so my hands are numb, and then my phone starts ringing. i hurry to get it and slip, faceplanting right there in the parking lot. [pretty sure someone saw, too.]

so i wipe myself off and jump in the car to leave, but there is just a little bit of snow left on the windshield.  figuring my wipers would do the job nicely, i turn them on... apparently the snow was too much for them to handle, because one snapped in half. of course, i had to finish cleaning the windshield with my bare hands and finally, i was on my way with numb hands, a sore face, and no windshield wipers.

after sliding multiple times and some near-death experiences [the plows hadn't made it to our part of town yet], i finally got the keys to hannah, when i remembered i had to go pick up shawna from the airport.  her flight got in at one, so i figured if i left at one [with all the snow] i would be right on time to pick her up. wrong-o. i got to the airport in under thirty minutes. i don't know how, or why, but it happened... resulting in me parking in a no park zone to wait [i hate waiting] and getting yelled at multiple times by the little men in yellow vests.  shawna finally got out and the day kinda started getting a little better from there... she bought me deltaco and i got to play in the snow with hann. (: still, it was a rough morning and i have the cuts and bruises to prove it.

[freezing cold... and i look like a cancer patient. but fun nonetheless.]

the events of the morning got me thinking. some might call me pessimistic on days like today, but i like to consider myself a realist.

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nice people really do finish last.  i'm at a point in my life where i feel like every nice thing i do is overlooked and i'm just getting walked all over by people that know i would do anything for them. i mean, i know there is eternal rewards for treating people kindly, but it seems to me you go so much farther in life if you trample on other people.  not saying that i will change the way i am; i've always been the kind of person that puts other people first, and i love that about me.  i always think about what the other person must be feeling before i act on my feelings, and it can be really rewarding at times. its just... sometimes i wish i was different. life would be so much easier to just not worry about other people, ya know? sometimes, all i want is a little recognition, but i guess that is too much to ask. not having to worry about anyone's feelings but your own must be nice.

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if you have to tell someone you did something, and you start with, "don't be mad, but..." isn't it safe to assume that you know they are going to be mad? in my opinion, if you are going to have to start a conversation out like that, don't do the thing in the first place, because they will be mad.
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i'm getting really sick of people that think they are the exception to every rule. their attitude goes a little something like this: 

-there are people dying in car accidents every day, but it won't happen to me so i can drive 90 miles an hour in the snow if i want. those crashed cars on the side of the road must have been stupid drivers.

-people get diagnosed with cancer on a regular basis, but that will never happen to me so i can smoke and chew tobacco as much as i want. i'm invincible.

-aids is a disease that only effects people in africa, so i don't have to be careful at all. i'm completely safe. 

-i know he cheats on every other girl he dates, but he really loves me so i'm going to be the one that makes the player quit his games.

you all know the people i'm talking about... and i'm sure we have all had these moments in our lives. but the thing is, more often than not, you're not the exception. you are the rule. and is it really worth the risk to find out if you actually are the only exception? i don't think so. there is too much resting on that chance.  i'm not saying that everyone needs to stop living their lives because they might get hurt, but i am saying don't be stupid. don't assume that bad things won't happen to you, because they will. the trials are going to come, and you are better off if you don't do anything to bring those trials on yourself. 

so yes... those are my slightly pessimistic realist thoughts for the day.

i'm sure i could go on and on about all the things i think are wrong with the world, but that would just be depressing, and i have a butt-load of homework, so it looks like i will just have to save those for another day! (: